numb

I survived 3 days of morning papers.and it really sucks,I totally hate it when I relate it to my future.3 hours of papers =my future?Life is not about exams,academics and how many A's.But I really felt so depressing and disappointed..I wish I have 8 GB memory.I looked at the questions..this is what I have studied,this one I can do.but ended up nothing like that.Seriously,the disappointment in urself is worst than the disappointments u felt in others.cause it's always so easy and forget.
I barely knew how to live.All I can do is rely on prayers.really..keep telling myself to keep holding on..have faith,keep believing in myself..but it's nver easy.never come to an edge of breaking down like this.and now I know how it felt.
A big thank you for all the wishes and prayers.It meant alot.
esp nana's "I can do all things thru Christ who strengthens me'
and bumbum
and sis..I was thinking abt wht kind of results I will get after tuition.I asked sis do i have alternative?sis told me tht u never even try then u are making conclusion.I really appreciate that.thats wht keeps me going until now.really need to take a break and recharge!
have faith and keep holding on!

roller-coaster

Too many things happened in this week.No break for my mental and physical health.Now,I'm down with itchy throat!mengada betul..Are you easily affected by people around you?If they are happy,you will be as bubbly and happy as them.But when they are sad,you can't help but eventually you will feel sad also?Honestly,I am that kind of person.I can't use any word to describe this kind of feeling other than roller-coaster.It's like one moment you are going to touch the sky!*doom*Now,you are slipping down.
I wanna search the 'old' me.The super optimistic one.The one always smile from the bottom of her heart.The one who always how to forgive and forget.The one who doesn't bother how people judge her.The one who wants to be happy 24/7.The one who can takes jokes well.The one who wants her loved ones to be happy all the time.
I don't know how long this mission is going to takes me.But I hope as soon as possible because I can't bear it anymore.If next time someone is angry yet I can still laugh like usual,it is not that I don't care how you feel,I do care,but I need a life.

糟透了!

难受的感觉真的糟透了!真的很难受!这几天都为了这个而烦.有朋友也烦,没有也烦.考试也考的不好,心情起伏很大.做朋友要这样吗?对不起,我不能把发生了的事当做没有事.难道一句道歉这么难说吗?我做错事,我一定会说的.可能越在乎的东西,越难放手吧.真的很难叻.不过我会学着放手的.毕竟它不是我的东西.我以为好朋友是一辈子的.为什么会有限期的呢?

amazing scenery!

This is so beautiful!!and it took us more than 2 hours or 3 to reach the top!
a part of my sweet memories =)

*One day,I'll be going there again =>

A loud sighh

This is a what I am feeling right nowww.I dont know how to explain this feeling but its like my heart is aching.I really heart you guys but why is it everybody is doing the same thing?This one tak tahu..(darn) and others said last min and so on.........I just got home at around 5pm and Mandy and I were trying our best ady.What more you guys want?Who are we suppose to depend then?I really feel like dont bother anymore...Sigh.......don't know what to say anymore..I thought growing up will not affect our relationships till now.What is everything different now?Can someone please tell me?

So yesterday

I know my blog is so yesterday!!still talking about CNY.Anyway,there is no much updates in my life.Everything is as usual just that I had tests recently.Apparently,I'm not good enough.So,got to work way harder for STPM.

Time really flies!It's march now.Soon,it will be novemeber and there is when I have to make a decision and really think about what I wanan do,But before that,I got to work really really hard to achieve what I have yearned for.

I have been going out since friday.Gosh,what a 'right' way to start my hols.But it felt really nice to ignore all the assignments and just chill with friends.By thw way,I went to Lim Kok Wing today.It was kinda fun when we were in the bus!making tonnes of noise by singing out of tune and so on.Thank god the driver just ignored us without telling us to shut up.

Some pretty bottles designed by the students there.

I like this!

Random scene

In putrajaya

The place which we visited during f3!

Blue blue skies!pure bliss =)

*I am going to finish this this hols!!!I wont take 1 year unlike someone =p!


It's a mixed feelings actually.It is unbearable because I can't stand the pain and I can't make it go away.I just dont know what you want and I really dont know what i want from you.I can't let things be like normal cause things are hanging there and it doesn't get me anywhere.The truth is I'm really confused whether to believe what I've heard and seen or just simply believe you and hoping that you are true to yourself?Tell me what should I do,will you?

CNY mode!!

Finally,it is Chinese New Year!!I am so excited cause I have been waiting CNY for monthssss!can't even concentrate in class and do my hw!(okay,i admit this is an lame excuse!)lol..I am going back to Sitiawan,Perak(mom's hometown) today after tuition.The best thing is I haven't finish packing and tuition starts at 3!how great it is!have to pack my homeworks and assignments along cause I'm going kulai,Johor after Perak.Can't wait for CNY as I can spend time with both paternal and maternal sides of relatives.

On the other side,I have alot of stuff to do!
Tell me how to eat reunion dinner peacefully with chemistry assignments,maths past year questions,revision questions,4 pa graphs,4 pa karangan!!

-But trust me,I will not let them bring my CNY spirit down as I will postpone them..xD-

Happy CNY people!!!Can't wait for 'chu wu''~Love all the way from perak!!

5/1/08

school reopens tomorrow!!depressed betull....sighhhh